Lets get straight into it shall we?
Right, so I had been waiting on a call or letter of confirmation regarding the scan appointment.
As you would know (refer to previous post), I was not living at home at this point in time, so my letter had been sent to my mum’s and of course I wasn’t in the know. I do thank God that both her and my sister did not check for any of my post.
Life began getting really busy, and it was only about to get busier, with work and our annual church conference ‘Winds Of Change’ which was fast approaching.
This was the PERFECT event to keep me distracted and occupied, it would take my mind off all the negative thoughts and ideas of what this lump represented.
2. YOU ARE NOT ALONE
NOW, to all my fighters out there, male/female, young and old. You will agree with me that in that moment, it did not matter how small or big the sign or change that might have taken place in your body was. Whether you were diagnosed or not. You got knocked back, that unexplainable, numb kind of feeling.
**Here Is A Reminder That YOU ARE NOT ALONE In This.**
I saw my Consultant and GP briefly this week. My GP said something that stuck with me, “some people give up fighting before the battle begins”.
Well, there is so much truth in this statement, and it took a second for it to sink in, but please believe I struggled. Just knowing this lump was present and waking up daily hoping it was gone. It really could have been nothing, but as a young woman, I grew up hearing different stories about women finding a lump in their breast and it being one of the major signs of breast cancer. So for myself, and any other woman who may have or is experiencing this right now, you immediately begin to think the worst.
Sometime towards the beginning of the month of March, after avoiding coming home and speaking to my mum or sister about it (my brother didn’t live at home), and not hearing from the hospital regarding my appointments, I finally decided to come home and check the post myself.
YOU GUESSED RIGHT… I HAD MAIL!! LOOL!!
I opened the letter to find out that I had missed my appointment by about a few days, I can’t really remember. All I knew was I had missed an important appointment, and even though I had avoided checking the post for a few weeks, I assumed it would have been courteous of them to call or send a reminder text.
All hope wasn’t lost, I just needed to call them up first thing in the morning to book another appointment.
NOW I’ll be honest, I cannot remember when I told my mum, but IF my memory serves me well, I believe it must have this particular night. Surprisingly she was calmer than I expected, although shocked too, I think I had to even repeat myself, then I could see a hint of worry, mixed with disbelief painted all over her face. She shook it off though, and then said a prayer in my mother tongue; “A o ni r’ogun cancer ni oruko Jesu”. TRANSLATION: “We will not see any cancer like problem in Jesus’ name”. The people will say, AMEN!
TM x